Monday, May 18, 2009

"That" annoying question



Good morning and happy Monday. I was prepared to compose a "feel good" post this A.M., but I heard "that" annoying question yesterday afternoon and I can't let it go. Any guess as to what was said? Here's a hint... it's arguably the unsolicited question that pisses the living hell irks an at-home dad the most. In fact, since this was a Sunday afternoon, any father might take issue with this one.

Perhaps this event is the equivalent of witnessing a purple three-legged giraffe walking down the street for some individuals, but truly once in a blue moon a dad might take the kids out of the house without a mom. Is this really so unusual? Come on! I was just hanging out at Petsmart minding my own business with the triplets and playing with the kittens available for adoption when an obnoxious old hag older woman asks "are you giving Mom a break today?"

Uh, let me ponder that one for a sec.............hell no hag "Long story...do you have some time ma'am? You might find this quite informative. To answer your question...yes and no, mom took our older daughter next door to Kohls to try on bathing suits and I'm killing some time here at the pet store, but honestly our situation is probably not too different from other families in America 2009. Here's the story Carol Brady. Sometimes Mom and Dad both work outside the home. Occasionally, neither works at all. In other cases, one or the other isn't even home at all........

Now Harriet Nelson, sometimes Mom or Dad will work outside the home while the other is what we call "at-home" or in your day "stay-at-home"... I'm actually currently the at-home dad and she's the out-of-home mom , so to answer your question...no, I am not actually giving her a 'break' today but you can give me one! So I'd appreciate it if you'd keep your effen questions to yourself June Cleaver!

OK, I'm starting to feel better. I'm telling myself that she didn't mean any harm. But why if she felt the need to say something didn't she find something more creative to ask or at the least offer a canned compliment? What did she have to gain by asking me "that" annoying question? To me, this ranks fairly close on the insensitivity scale to asking a dieter how much more he intends to lose...or a single woman in her mid-30's when she's getting married.

Here's a suggestion for next time......let's just talk about the weather. Out.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are my first Dad blogger and it was a great soapbox. Speaking for my generation, the over 50 crowd, it is unusual. I have always felt that the person who wanted to stay at home should do it, regardless of gender. It's a tough gig but if you can afford it, it's a good one.

Beth said...

Some of the most involved parents at my school are dads - and they aren't giving the mom a break. They are just doing their job.

I totally get your point on this.

A Free Man said...

I know. I hear that a lot too on my day off with the boy. It's always from older women. I want to ask in reply "Oh, is it your day off from the nursing home?" but I was raised in the South and am incapable of being rude to older women.

Expat No. 3699 said...

I would have responded with, "Why, are you giving your husband one?"

Anyhoo, I've brought my grandkids to PetSmart to kill time. I call it the Poor Man's Zoo.

Anonymous said...

I can totally understand how that would urk you off. You spend everyday caring for your children, yet people assume you're only around part time. Thanks for being a Great Dad.

Oh yes, Happy Monday. :D

Jocelyn said...

Gracious, I'm glad I stumbled into your blog tonight. My husband's been our stay-at-home the last nine years, and it has irked us both when he's admired in the grocery store for "babysitting."

Or, um, just being a parent.

Badass Geek said...

I hate stereotypes as much as you seem to.

msprimadonna67 said...

Oh, that would have driven me crazy, too. I always find it interesting the assumptions people make without any information about your life at all.

Aunt Juicebox said...

It's still not the norm for dad to stay home with the kids, but hey, you're carving out the path for other dads to do it, and eventually it'll be just as common to see the dad caring for the kids as the mom. I don't care who does it, as long as the kids get taken care of. Too many neglected children in this world.

blissfully caffeinated said...

Dude, I just noticed on your profile that you live in Roseville. I used to live in Roseville. I miss it badly. Will you tell the Galleria I said, "Hello." Thanks. *wipes tears*